Two men, the Critic and the Owner, walking the Owner's gallery towards a rather unremarkable abstract blob on a pedestal. Critic: "... so when you told me you had a previously unidentified Pollard well naturally I was terribly excited." Owner: "Naturally" Critic: "My collection may not be the largest but I dare say it represents some of his most inspired work. I mean, even to be near something that that genius called into being-- Is this it?" Owner: "That's the one." Critic is regarding it critically. Owner: "You see, I picked it up--" Critic: "No, no. That's not Pollard." Owner: "What? Look at the progression of--" Critic: "No, completely uninspired, nothing like his work. Moronic. Subhuman." Owner: "Well--" Critic: "I'd say you'd have had better luck passing off the pedestal, at least it was made by someone with sight and working hands." Owner: "Now look--" Critic: "I'm looking, I'm trying to see it, and all I see is 'Shit on a pedestal'. 'Ill-sculped shit on a pedestal, owned by a complete dimwit who weaseled his way into the art world by dumb luck'. To even call it sculpture is to disgrace the art form." Owner: "Now see here--" Critic: "I'll buy it." Owner: "--what?" Critic: "I said I'll buy it. Rather, " [pulls out hammer] "I'll give you $5 to let me smash it with this hammer." Owner: "I should say not!" Critic: "Well at least let me smash the pedestal, it shouldn't have to suffer this indignity." Not sure how to wrap it up yet.